Tag: weather

No Snow Out Our Way, Confirms Local Man

DESPITE widespread pleas from Met Éireann and the Garda Síochána to take care as wintry conditions blanket much of the country in snow and ice, Waterford man Gerry McHugh has insisted that his day will go ahead as planned due to the fact that there doesn’t appear to be any snow ‘out his way’. Fenor local… Read more »

Met Éireann Confirm Current Fog Is 90% Vape

A SPOKESPERSON for the Met office has confirmed that the dense fog currently coating the country is a result of high amounts of vape smoke, probably due to New Years smoking resolutions. Currently at an Orange Warning level, the country is experiencing thick clouds of mist reducing visibility significantly on all major routes, which meteorologists… Read more »

Do You Have Photos Of The Snow? You Might Be The Only One

A LARGESCALE appeal has been made to the public to provide photographic evidence that it has snowed in Ireland, following the horrific news that it seems no one has been able to take pictures of the white stuff. “We’re exploring the possibility that all phone cameras and conventional cameras have simultaneously stopped working, which would… Read more »

Weather Issues Met Éireann Warning

THE Irish weather has issued a statement in which it warns the public to be aware of sweeping statements blowing westerly across the country from the headquarters of Met Éireann, which will pick up speed and ferocity as the month of December rolls in. The missive explained how the gusts of panic and dread will… Read more »

Shops Increase Umbrella Prices By 400%

RETAILERS up and down the country have come in for criticism following their decision to up the prices of umbrellas by a whopping 400% as of this morning. With many parts of the country battered expected to be drenched by torrential rains, the struggling retail sector has sought to capitalise on the public’s need for… Read more »

Confusion Over As ‘Miserable Weather Outside’ Confirmed By Old Woman In Post Office

TENS of confused people were said to be ‘alleviated’ today after an elderly woman confirmed there was ‘miserable weather outside’ whilst waiting in a queue for the post office. Sources say many customers were disorientated when they initially entered the building; not knowing what the hell was happening outside. “I remember having my umbrella up… Read more »

Adults Book Holidays As Annual Leaving Cert Weather Approaches

Following on from confirmation by Met Eireann earlier today that Ireland has entered its official ‘Leaving Cert Weather’ period thousands of adults are booking getaways and days off to coincide with the guaranteed good weather. “There is no logical answer to it but regardless of the larger meteorological circumstances, each year Ireland experiences fantastic weather… Read more »