Tag: sport

Mike Tyson Reassures Ronaldo Everybody Forgets About It Eventually

AS reports of accusations of rape made against the world’s most recognisable athlete, Cristiano Ronaldo, slowly but surely begin to make page 48 of a few newspapers, boxing legend Mike Tyson has spoken publicly to reassure Ronaldo people just sort of forget about you raping someone sometimes when you’re famous enough. Tyson, jailed for 6… Read more »

Argumentative Assholes Suddenly Discover Interest In Tennis

THE SPORT of tennis has recorded a sudden and unprecedented number of new fans, all seemingly from the same corner of world where the Earth’s argumentative assholes live and breathe. The huge surge in popularity and increased coverage in the media has stemmed from Naomi Osaka’s historic US Open tennis victory as she became the… Read more »

WWN Previews England V Sweden, Russia V Croatia

WWN brings you the very best analysis of the World Cup from its expert sports team. England V Sweden: The game being billed as the reason we might have to endure the phrase ‘It’s Coming Home’ for just a little bit longer. Expectations at the start of the tournament were relatively low but following the… Read more »

Boring Man Talks Passionately About Golf

AT THE risk of driving people to fall asleep while standing up, a local boring man has gone on record to speak passionately about golf, WWN understand. Cormac Nevlin (32), a notoriously boring man, spoke to coworkers about making the most of the recent good weather by playing a round of golf at his local… Read more »

Local Football Fan Still Doesn’t Rate Man City

DESPITE Man United’s 1-0 loss to West Brom securing the 2018 Premier League for Manchester City, one local football fan remains adamant they are nothing more than a rag tag bunch of untalented semi-professional footballers who got very lucky. Ciaran Ballane (22) explained to friends and football forums that it takes more than winning a… Read more »