Tag: pope

“Isn’t It Time We Forgave The Church?”

In his latest column, Bishop Cornelius Byle, WWN’s resident priest and conscience expert, poses the question ‘surely it’s time to forgive the Church in the matters of covering up child sexual abuse, disposing of babies in a septic tanks, selling children illegally to couples in America, condemning women to servitude and hard labour and a… Read more »

“The Power Of Christ Compels You” Screams The Pope After Tackling Trump To The Ground

REPORTS emanating from the Vatican this morning contrast greatly with the official accounts of US President Donald Trump’s first meeting with Pope Francis, WWN can confirm. The first meeting between the two leaders had been much anticipated after the Pope decried the toxic messages Trump shared on his presidential campaign, solidified by Republican budget proposals… Read more »

‘Humble’ Pope Francis Still Insists On Wiping Own Arse, Reveals Vatican Arse Wiper

THE VATICAN’S chief toilet attendant revealed today that newly appointed Pope Francis the first still insists on wiping his own arse after using the lavatory. Cardinal Rodrigo Gonzalez believes the papal refusal for assisted anus cleansing is an early sign that times at the Roman Catholic Church may be changing. “The Holy Father stopped me midway insisting I leave… Read more »