Tag: politics

Nation 100% Certain Harris Is Up To Something

MINISTER for health Simon Harris’s decision to forgo his St. Patrick’s Day trip to Europe to stay in Ireland and tackle the trolley crisis in A&E wards has been met with heavy scepticism by the Nation, with the vast majority of people wondering just what he’s up to. With the number of patients waiting for treatment… Read more »

“I’m Just Used To The Fucking State Of The Place” Waterford Quays Objection Filed

AN Bórd Pleanála has confirmed that 3 valid objections to the development plans for Waterford’s North Quays have been received and will take up to 18 weeks for them to make a decision. Despite Waterford City & County Council publicly stating no objection was received last Thursday evening, allowing Taoiseach Leo Varadkar to deliver the good news to Waterford’s WIT arena the following… Read more »

Stormont To Start Letting Rooms Out On Airbnb

KEEN to avoid any accusations that they’re wasting public resources, the remaining shards of the Northern Assembly have put a number of rooms in Stormont up on accommodation-sharing website Airbnb, in a bid to ‘make a few quid’. With the vast majority of the rooms in the east Belfast castle lying idle since the collapse… Read more »

Trump Note Includes Instructions To Not Grab Any Pussies

CLOSER inspection of a note spotted in the hands of President Donald Trump at a discussion about the Parkland school shooting has revealed a number of notes and guidelines seemingly written by POTUS himself, including ‘don’t mention grabbing pussies’, ‘try steer things back to the stock market’, and ‘blame violence on Schwartchennegger [sic] movies’. As he… Read more »