-
Key Takeaways From The ‘Garda Síochána Powers Bill’
THE CONTROVERSIAL Gardaí Siochána (Powers) Bill which has been criticised by civil liberty groups and law experts will be published ... -
Tearful Netanyahu Hands Over Keys To Palestinian Demolition Equipment
OUSTED Israeli premier Benjamin Netanyahu has relinquished control of his fleet of heavy construction equipment to the country’s new prime ... -
“12.5% Is The Irish For ‘15%'” Donohoe Tells G7 Leaders
IRELAND’S panicked Minister for Finance Paschal Donohoe has been frantically ringing world leaders attending the G7 summit in Cornwall in ... -
Conman Relieved He’s Not Breaking Law Going Door To Door Posing As Tradesman
“OH THANK fuck, for a minute there I thought I was committing fraud or something,” relieved local conman Danny Lacken ... -
“It’s Okay, We’re All Filthy Liars” Political Parties Confirm
RESPONDING to the news that Sinn Féin had previously instructed members to don fake ID badges and lie to voters ... -
McDonald Promises To Treat Sinn Féin To Takeaway Tonight After Receiving £800,000 Donation
LOGGING into Sinn Féin’s banking app for a 50th time in the last hour just to stare at the bulging ... -
Varadkar Finds Old ‘Welfare Cheats Cheat Us All’ Sign When Clearing Out Shed
“DOES this even still fit me?” laughed Tánaiste Leo Varadkar today, after his iconic sign from the ‘Welfare Cheats Cheat ... -
British Public Not Sure Whether To Believe Lying Sack Of Shit Over Self-Serving Bullshitter
BRITAIN enters its second day agonising over whether or not to believe a self-serving bullshitter who is a thinly veiled ... -
Tory Party Soar Ahead In Polls After Damning Evidence Exposes Johnson
FORMER ministerial aide Dominic Cummings has read out a litany of shocking revelations about his time at number 10, resulting ... -
“I Sure Told Them” Insists Exhausted Coveney After Issuing 50th Condemnation Of The Day
COLLAPSING from sheer exhaustion at having to sign off on an endless stream of stern words and condemnations of regimes ...