Tag: news

New Diet Craze Will Only Kill 30% Of Participants

A new dieting craze which has been sweeping the Nation since the 1st of January has come under fresh scrutiny following a number of revelations. Thousands of people up and down the country have been partaking in the new ‘uber diet’ Gutt Ü after leading magazines claimed a number of celebrities had adopted it in… Read more »

Church Hires JK Rowling To Rewrite The Bible

The latest PR coup for Pope Francis has seen him hire famous and revered children’s author JK Rowling to rewrite the Bible. It is hoped the author, most famous for her Harry Potter series, can make it more accessible and believable for a new generation of Catholics and Christians. While the specifics of the rewrite… Read more »

Lack Of ‘Sexy’ Irish Words Hindering Erotic Novelist

Minister for Arts, Heritage and Gaeltacht Jimmy Deenihan has come under intense criticism from the country’s leading Irish language erotic novelist, Niamh O’Moore. Miss O’Moore whose books have set the Irish speaking percentage of the populations’ hearts racing believes the minister needs to support the growing area of Irish literature known affectionately as ‘Clit Lit’…. Read more »

Man Has A Great Idea For An App

 WWN is proud to give a voice to the young and innovative people of Ireland. This week James O’Donovan, a 31-year-old marketing executive, has a great idea for an app: I’ve always been a bit of an ideas man, but I, like many people in this current economic climate, lack to the ability to fund… Read more »

Morgan Freeman Is The New Voice Of The Irish Aurals

Minister for Education Ruairi Quinn is yet again courting fresh controversy after announcing a number of changes to the Irish Junior and Leaving Certificate curriculum. One change which has immediately come under intense and impassioned criticism is the use of Oscar winning actor Morgan Freeman as the new voice of the Irish Aural exams. Bewildered… Read more »

JobBridge Intern Getting Really Good At Photocopying

WWN’s resident intern Kevin ‘Trev’ Murray is finally beginning to see some of his obvious potential flourish. After a tricky start at Ireland’s leading news publication Trev, as he is still known to colleagues, is settling in and making clear his talents to all in the organisation. As part of his JobBridge internship Kevin was… Read more »

Travellers Told To Adopt D4 Accent If They Want To Move In

A controversial site in the salubrious surroundings of Dublin’s Mount Merrion market for a number of families from the travelling communities is in the news again today. Proposals to house several traveller families in the upmarket area of Mount Merrion have been passed despite being met with vociferous opposition by local residents and councillors who… Read more »

County Footballer Runs Out Of Local Women To Have Sex With

WWN has learnt of the sad plight currently being endured by a prominent inter-county footballer. The Dublin footballer, whose identity is not yet known, is believed to be struggling under the weight of having slept with pretty much every single woman in his local community. A source close to the footballer spoke exclusively to WWN… Read more »