Tag: instant

Man Utd Sign Fabregas In Man Utd Fan’s Head

Gary Farrell, a lifelong Manchester United fan took affirmative action last night and signed Spanish international Cesc Fabregas while simultaneously drooling on his pillow while muttering ‘come, lie beside me Cesc. Now, through ball me’. While the news that transfer signings made by fans as they dream are not transferable to real life has proved… Read more »

Rolf Harris’ Fee For Children’s Parties Decreasing Rapidly By The Day

VETERAN entertainer Rolf Harris is feeling the brunt of today’s cut-throat entertainment marketplace, after it was revealed that the Antipodean octogenarian has been forced to dramatically reduce his fee for performing at children’s parties. Having gained fame for his singing career, which included such hits as Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Two Little Boys, SHHH! Don’t… Read more »

Ireland Preparing Itself For Influx Of J1 Pictures On Social Media

WWN has learned that as many as 84,000 images will be uploaded every hour by Irish students in America this Summer. The rite of passage known as the ‘J1’ involves countless happy-go-lucky and hard-working students becoming addicted to gloating, leaving those elsewhere struggling to enjoy using social media. “I would of course go outside and… Read more »