Tag: instant

‘Could You Not Protest In English?’ Government Asks Irish Language Protesters

A week after a 10,000 strong protest took take place in Dublin, another protest was carried out by those seeking protection for the Irish language. Yesterday’s protest took place in Spiddal, Co. Galway and was yet another strong indication that Irish speakers are unsatisfied with the Government’s handling of the Irish language. Outgoing Irish language… Read more »

‘Well There’s Always Euro 2048’ Say Irish Fans

The draw for the qualification stage of Euro 2016 took place yesterday and gave many football fans the chance to speculate wildly on the fortunes of their respective countries. Ireland found themselves in a tough position with Germany, Poland, Scotland, Georgia and Gibraltar taking their place alongside the boys in green in group D. While… Read more »

Calls For Cull On Healy-Rae’s

THE DEVASTATION caused by an ever increasing number of Healy-Rae’s on the west coast of Ireland has reached epidemic proportions, it has been revealed today. Locals have asked the government for a cull on the strain of human, which has so far cost the tax-payer millions of euros in damages. “They’re everywhere you look the… Read more »

WWN Horoscopes

Aries March 21 – April 19 Bruno Mars is in ascension, which means this week your head will be filled with catchy but empty pop songs. Taurus April 20 – May 20 Spoiler alert! You die. Gemini May 21 – June 20 Don’t listen to your friends, it is time to ask out that guy… Read more »

The Secret Minister – At The Dark End Of The Street…

Gay marriage? Whistleblowers? Mortgage forgiveness? Health reform? Other problems Irish society probably has? The list of causes I can exploit for my own reasonable political gain are near endless. An Taoiseach knows battles must be picked, ministers must be backed and on occasion you must say as little as possible of any substance to ensure… Read more »

Adult Male Wonders If Playing With His Freshly Cut Toenail Clippings After Shower Is Normal

NORMALLY functioning adult, James Hogan, wondered to himself whether playing with his toenail clippings was normal, after freshly clipping them post-shower this morning. The 34-year-old barman spent over ten minutes bending and rolling his nails while sitting on the edge of his bed, but admitted hiding the specimens from long-time partner Geraldine Holden when she… Read more »