Tag: instant

One Direction Concerts Cancelled Amid Shit Music Fears

MCD, together with their concert partner, Croke Park, have taken the regrettable decision to cancel the upcoming and highly anticipated One Direction concerts that were scheduled to take place in Dublin. “We had not envisaged taking such drastic action,” read a statement from promoter MCD, “but it has been brought to our attention again and… Read more »

Powdered Buckfast To Be Sold In Wraps

BUCKFAST is to be sold in a powdered form and will be available in “wrap deals” for the first time, the firm behind the controversial tonic wine has announced today. The alcoholic drink, which is brewed by satanic worshippers in Devon, is quite popular with young people in Scotland and Ireland due to it’s “speedy… Read more »

‘Student Lightweights Ruining Scuzz Buzz For Everyone Else’, Claims Waterford Lad

COUNTY Waterford lad Jamie Lonergan made a controversial claim today that certain students were ruining the reputation of a new cocktail drug called scuzz, by being “total lightweights” and “freaking out to their mammy’s”. The furious Mr. Lonergan made the claim outside Supermacs to the lads last night, stating “young fellas shouldn’t be taking acid if… Read more »