Tag: instant

Ploughing Match Struck By Flat Cap Shortage

THE Irish Farmers Association has issued an urgent appeal for new and used flat caps, bodywarmers, and welly boots, after the National Ploughing Championship was hit with one of the worst farmer’s clothing droughts in generations. Analysts have confirmed that there are currently somewhere in the region of 300,000 people at the Tullamore event, including… Read more »

Ibrahim Halawa Comment Section Trial Delayed For The 25th Time

THE verdict on the internet comment section trial of Irishman Ibrahim Halawa has reportedly been delayed for the 25th time in Ireland, WWN has learned. Despite being acquitted of all charges against him by an Egyptian court in Cairo, an online jury of experts continue to deliberate the fate of the 21-year-old by carefully flicking through evidence published… Read more »

Ryanair Offer Sincere Apology For €5 Per Passenger

BELEAGUERED budget airline RyanAir have made thousands of apologies available to customers following the company’s mishandling of flight cancellations, for the low, low price of just €4.99 each. The airline was forced to cancel up to fifty flights a day between now and October, following a holiday allowance backlog that left them with a critical… Read more »

New Student Signs Up With 50 Socs He’ll Never Attend

A NEW student at UCD has spent his first week signing up for a wide range of clubs and societies, with many experts stating that he will either fail to attend or drop out of, between now and Christmas. Carlow native Sean Guiney, who is about to begin his degree in business at the college,… Read more »

Mikael Ø Lunde Announced As New CEO Of Norwegian Air

NORWEGIAN airline Norwegian Air has announced the appointment of a new Chief Executive today following revelations that the carrier has poached as many as 140 pilots from rival budget airline, Ryanair. Mikael Ø Lunde, a successful 56-year-old newsagent franchise owner and income tax advisor, will take over duties from Bjørn Kjos at the start of October. Donning his trademark… Read more »