Tag: instant

Revealed: St. Patrick’s Raging Alcoholism

“MEAD. That was the tough one. It’s hard to stand on the side of a hill and convert a thousand Celts the morning after you’ve had a fucking skinful of Mead,” said St. Patrick, mournfully taking a drag on an Amber Leaf rollie as he stared out across the tundras of heaven. Patrick, who recently… Read more »

Lidl Install Security Walls Around Shops As Snow Predicted

AN UNPRECEDENTED level of construction is currently taking place at Lidl stores across the country as Met Éireann weather reports have confirmed the potential return of snow in the coming days. With 189 of Lidl’s 190 Irish shops still in operation, the retailer has begun construction of large JCB-proof security walls which will inhibit anyone… Read more »