Tag: health

Government Tick ‘Completely Fuck Over CervicalCheck Victims’ Off Their To Do List

THE GOVERNMENT has capped the expenses package promised to victims of the CervicalCheck scandal, with victims only allowed claim on expenses incurred after the 11th May 2018. Ticking off ‘completely fuck over CervicalCheck victims’ their list, the government freed up time to either pretend homeless figures are going down or distract the public by getting… Read more »

Very Modern Ireland Loudly Tutting At Northern Ireland’s Abortion Laws

THE UK SUPREME Court’s rejection of an appeal from human rights campaigners over Northern Ireland’s abortion laws has given the Yes voting people of Ireland just the 4,567th opportunity to tut dismissively in the direction of Northern Ireland, decrying how it’s a shame it can’t be as astoundingly progressive as the Republic. Very modern, progressive,… Read more »

“Don’t Thank Me All At Once” – Taoiseach

SWOOPING in at the last minute to take all of the credit that doesn’t belong to him, Taoiseach Leo Varadkar has heralded the successful campaign to repeal the 8th amendment by appearing in front of the world’s leading media agencies in a bid to make it look like this was all his idea, WWN can… Read more »

Heavy Drinkers Evolve To Grow Second, Spare Liver

IRISH doctors have heralded the evolution of some test subjects who have grown a second liver to compensate for their heavy drinking which was previously wreaking havoc on their bodies, WWN has learned. With 3 alcohol related deaths occurring in Ireland everyday, some heavy drinkers have accelerated the rate of their physiological evolution to grow… Read more »