Tag: football

Dublin Win Leinster Championzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

THE DUBLIN GAA team have clinched the Leinster Senior Football Championship title for the eighth year in a row, after a decisive victory over Laois at Croke Park yeste rda y at Crokk park wher decisive victory Leinster… Sorry, just dozed off there for a second. Apologies. Dublin cruised to victory over Laois with a… Read more »

It’s The ADWWNWCRU (Almost Daily WWN World Cup Round Up)

England will win the World Cup after slaying the mighty Panama 6-1 and there’s no way they can cock this up, the English media have confirmed. Despite the poor opposition England nevertheless impressed in the thrashing, however, Harry Kane is being investigated after his third goal revealed the striker seems to be wearing football magnets… Read more »

It’s The DWWNWCRU (Daily WWN World Cup Round Up)

DESPITE what Maroon 5 say, everything little thing will not be alright. War, famine, violence, inequality and poverty engulfs the world. There is only suffering. Anyway, get yourself down to your local Hyundai dealer where the prices for the i20 start at just €15,000. Denmark and Australia finished even stevens, with Australia saved by a… Read more »

Urgent Appeal Launched For Two More Lads For Astro On Friday

AN urgent appeal has been launched by three Waterford men, who have found themselves ‘struggling for numbers’ ahead of this Friday’s must-attend Astroturf 5-a-side kickaround and drinking session. The call went out on Twitter yesterday evening as Derek Wilson, Paul Canning and Sean Hanlon issued tweets from their personal accounts urging anyone with information about… Read more »

Mo Salah Ascends To Heaven

LIVERPOOL and Egyptian forward Mo Salah ascended to Heaven/Jannah directly after being substituted last night, with God deeming him too precious an example of celestial perfection to risk keeping down on Earth any longer. A thunderous sound pulsed through Anfield following Salah’s 2 goals and 2 assists with a shaft of immense light striking down… Read more »

Local Football Fan Still Doesn’t Rate Man City

DESPITE Man United’s 1-0 loss to West Brom securing the 2018 Premier League for Manchester City, one local football fan remains adamant they are nothing more than a rag tag bunch of untalented semi-professional footballers who got very lucky. Ciaran Ballane (22) explained to friends and football forums that it takes more than winning a… Read more »