Tag: epl

Increasing Number Of Liverpool Fans Left With No Fingernails

FOLLOWING on from a nervy Champions League first leg tie against Bayern Munich and awaiting Sunday’s cagey match against a revitalised Manchester United, an increasing number of anxious Liverpool fans have chewed their fingernails down to nothing, WWN Sport can reveal. Gone are the memories of early January during which time Liverpool fans sauntered around… Read more »

Non-Man United Fans Inconsolable After Mourinho Sacking

SCENES of eyes red raw from sobbing have been reported around Premier League grounds which are not Old Trafford as non-Manchester United football fans come to terms with the most entertaining episode in soccer schadenfreude came to an end with the sacking of Jose Mourinho. “Taken too soon, I hadn’t even properly got all my… Read more »

Happiness Directly Linked To Whether Group Of Millionaires Beat Other Millionaires

RESEARCH coming into WWN Sport this morning confirms there is overwhelming evidence that a growing number of people’s happiness is directly linked to whether or not one group of millionaires can triumph over a number of near indecipherable groups of millionaires. The millionaire’d groups, largely hailing from a variety of nations but located in a… Read more »

Mourinho To Practice Latest Meltdown In Front Of Mirror

NOTING the ever dwindling impact of his attempts to place the blame on others for his own failings as a manager, Jose Mourinho will practice his next meltdown/rant/lambasting of a 16-year-old youth team player in front of the mirror. Spending much of the summer’s pre-season before the start of the Premier League giving out about… Read more »

Sanchez Goes On Strike During First Day At United

MANCHESTER UNITED’S new star forward Alexis Sanchez has gone on strike hours after securing his dream bank balance, WWN Sport can exclusively report. While United’s most vocal detractors questioned how wise it was to hand a 29-year-old player seemingly motivated solely by money a four-year contract reportedly worth £500,000 per week after tax, they expressed… Read more »