Tag: dublin

Woman Enters 25th Year Of Pretending To Be A Lesbian

LOCAL woman Marie Finlan is reported to be sticking with her pretense of being a lesbian after a quarter of a century, according to sources in her small, rural hometown. Having initiated her ‘lesbian phase’ in the early nineties after returning from trying to be cool while attending college in Dublin, Waterford local Finlan was expected to… Read more »

Lad On Bus Gets Random Erection Just Before His Stop

WWN understands that earlier today a Dublin man was treated for shock following an incident involving his erection. Patrick Dooley, a 22 year-old DIT student, was on the 16 bus heading out of town when the disturbing incident occurred. Eye witness accounts state that Patrick seemed to look around nervously as the bus approached the… Read more »

Dublin Man ‘Just A Friend’ For 134th Time

THERE were touching yet somewhat depressing scenes in Dublin last night as friends gathered to acknowledge perennial ‘just a friend’ Darragh Sweeney on the occasion of his 25th birthday. “Ah, I love him to bits,” shared beautiful model and strictly friends with Darragh, Ciara Coveney. “Me and Darragh? God, no! I mean he asked me… Read more »

Cork Lad Thinks About Cork Every 3 Seconds

Conal Lynch, a proud Cork native, struggled to concentrate in work this afternoon, WWN can exclusively reveal. Sitting on the third floor looking out over Harcourt St in the Nation’s capital Conal thought to himself ‘it’s no Princes St’. The 26-year-old accountant found himself growing ever more restless throughout his working day, his head filled… Read more »

Dublin Gang Intern Disappointed Crime Is Nothing Like Love/Hate

Anthony Mulhearn was said to be left disappointed after completing a 3-month internship with a leading Dublin gang. 17 year-old Anthony Mulhearn from Donabate, Dublin is reportedly regretting his decision to take up an internship with a leading crime gang after he described the experience as ‘a complete waste of time’. Anthony, inspired by hit… Read more »