Tag: crime

“Husband Did It” Insists Mother Watching News

DETECTIVES investigating a years-old murder cold case in rural Waterford have sought the counsel of a random Leitrim woman who has insisted from day one that ‘the husband did it’ based on nothing more than that’s just what she thinks. The death of Lisnan woman Cait McRian, who was discovered dead in her home in… Read more »

Heartwarming! These Scumbags Joined Forces & Realised They Could Commit More Crimes Together

IN RESPONSE to a greater community awareness and increasing cooperation among neighbours to tackle burglaries and theft, a group of downtrodden and frustrated scumbags resolved to share their expertise and resources after they realised they would be able to commit more crimes if they committed them together. This is one heartwarming story you’re going to… Read more »

Mafia Distance Themselves From Comparisons To FIFA

THE MAFIA has been quick to distance themselves from comparisons to football’s governing body FIFA after it emerged two witnesses in a corruption case against former FIFA executives have turned up dead in recent days, WWN confirm. “Hey now, don’t drag our names into this, you’re making us look bad,” confirmed mafia spokesmademan Tony Palatino,… Read more »

Friday Night Ruined After Massive Drugs Haul

THE DRUG TAKING portion of the population of Ireland has entered a period of mourning, following news that a tiny fraction of the drugs consumed of a weekend were being seized by Gardaí in county Meath, WWN can confirm. Friday night sessions across the country have been ruined as a result, with recreational drug users… Read more »