Tag: britain

“14 Dead Bodies Insufficient Evidence,” Confirm British Government

AFTER learning that Northern Ireland’s Public Prosecution Service will prosecute just one of 16 British soldiers for their involvement in ‘Bloody Sunday’ in Derry in 1972, the British government has concurred with the PPS that the bodies of 14 civilians amounted to nothing more than insufficient evidence. ‘Soldier F’ will now face trial in connection… Read more »

Britain Shits In Hands & Claps

SOURCES close to the formerly Great Britain have intimated this may be the 17th time this week that the unhinged state has shat in its hands before willfully clapping as if in celebration only to spread excrement everywhere in the process. Those with knowledge on the repeated shitting in own hands and then applauding enthusiastically… Read more »

New IRA Ordering Bombs From Wish.Com

THE FLEDGLING terrorist organisation known as IRA 2019 has claimed responsibility for a number of suspect devices posted to addresses throughout the UK last week, and have promised more to follow once their Wish.com order arrives. Improvised explosive devices were sent to London and Glasgow in packaging that bore postage stamps and markings from Ireland,… Read more »

Jeremy Corbyn Wakes From 2-Year Coma

BRITAIN is still experiencing the aftershocks of a political earthquake following Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn’s sudden awakening from a coma which saw him lie stationary in bed, unable to function or direct the Labour party, and trapped in a braindead-like state for roughly 2 years. Bolting upright Corbyn took in a deep breath as if… Read more »

Exhausted British Voters Quit British Politics

RESPONDING to the news 8 Labours MPs and 3 Tory MPs have quit their parties to form the Independent Group adding to the already considerable chaos, exhausted Britons have thrown their hands up in the air and quit British politics. “I didn’t know we could quit. Brilliant,” confirmed one Briton who was flummoxed by the… Read more »