Category: WORLD NEWS

First International Hypocrite Convention Passes Without Incident

YESTERDAY’S inaugural International Hypocrite Convention held in Paris passed without incident, amid fears that the participants may have been the target of people wondering how they managed to sleep at night. The convention, which shattered the record for the largest congregation of hypocrites in one place, coincided with a solidarity rally in which an estimated… Read more »

Satire Vows Not To Negotiate With Terrorists

SATIRISTS around the world have reaffirmed their continued commitment to ridiculing specious and redundant intolerance long abandoned by rational human beings. While those deeply offended by depictions of the Prophet Muhammed have been critical of so-called ‘satirical extremists’, the pencil of the cartoonist and the pen of the writer have yet to murder anyone in… Read more »

Buckingham Palace Proposes Ban On ‘Sexy’ Children

A STATEMENT issued by the Royal family today has proposed an outright ban on ‘good-looking children’, recommending a head-to-toe garment to be worn by kids of a ‘sexual persuasion’. The proposal comes just days after an underage sex scandal involving the Duke of York, Prince Andrew, and a then 17-year-old girl. The woman – said to be 30-year-old… Read more »

CIA Torture Files Show Detainees Were Forced To Go Shopping On Christmas Eve

A DAMNING US Senate Intelligence Committee report released last week has pinpointed several instances in which detainees at CIA ‘black sites’ around the world were forced to endure indescribable acts of torture, including being forced into shopping on Christmas Eve. Under the Bush administration, terror suspects from around the world were detained in prison camps… Read more »