Category: WORLD NEWS

“There Was No Collusion, We’re Really Just That Stupid” Confirm Americans

THE American people have come forward after the seemingly inconclusive Mueller Report into interference from the Russian government in the 2016 election to stress that they didn’t need Moscow to tell them that Donald Trump was their man, they’re ‘plenty stupid enough on their own’. Based on the a summary by Attorney General Bill Barr, the long-awaited Mueller Report seems… Read more »

“Sorry” McGregor Apologises To Fans For Marching With Varadkar

PART-TIME UFC fighter Conor McGregor has apologised today for marching side-by-side with Irish leader Leo Varadkar, stating he was “unaware” the Taoiseach was going to be attending the Chicago St. Patrick’s Day parade and that he is “truly embarrassed” by the whole fiasco. With the Irish Embassy in Chicago seeking answers as to how the world champion fighter was… Read more »

Everything You Need To Know About Beto O’Rourke

THE TEXAS democrat narrowly lost to Ted Cruz in a race for the US Senate and has now announced his bid to secure the Democratic nomination for the 2020 presidential election. A father-of-three with a penchant for delivering uplifting and impassioned speeches drawing comparisons to Barack Obama, here’s everything you need to know about Beto… Read more »

Local Kids Won’t Shut Up About The Environment

ONE LOCAL Waterford father has put on record his annoyance at his children’s insistence that they be allowed partake in worldwide Climate Change protests, WWN can reveal. “Little pushy shits never shut up about the fucking environment,” confirmed John Legerty, who hasn’t been allowed put anything in a bin for years now without being asked… Read more »

“Fuck Terrorism” Confirms Everyone

AS THE DEPRESSINGLY familiar scenes from the latest attack on innocent civilians etched itself into the minds of people, joining other incidents and memories sadly too easy to recall, every right minded person concluded that terrorism ‘can get fucked’. “Yeah, fuck terrorism,” everyone confirmed, with a conviction and defiance that suggested their capacity to remain… Read more »