Category: WORLD NEWS

Waterford Man Finds Elusive HTTP 404 Hiding In Attic

A COUNTY Waterford Man discovered the elusive HTTP 404 hiding in his attic after he began putting away his Christmas decorations late yesterday evening. Michael Price contacted local Gardai after uncovering the standard response code at 8pm. The father-of-four said he was absolutely shocked to discover it had been living in his attic for over… Read more »

Meek To Sue Jesus Over Earth Inheritance Claim

THE MEEK have announced they are suing Jesus Christ of Nazareth over an Earth inheritance claim which was promised to them nearly 2000 years ago. The group have said they are ‘sick and tired’ of waiting around for the inheritance to be signed over to them, and have hired a team of lawyers to help… Read more »

Man High On Meth Who Fought Off Policemen While Masturbating Declared World’s First Male Multi-Tasker

37-year-old Andrew Frey made international headlines this week after news spread of his extraordinary altercation with American police officials. While in an Oregan restaurant Frey reportedly engaged in a series of outbursts before police arrived on the scene to subdue him. Unfortunately for the police officers Frey was high on crystal meth and he made… Read more »

Richard Dawkins Doesn’t Exist, Claim Christians

A small group of fervent Christians have today announced that international best selling author and prominent atheist Richard Dawkins does not exist. What at first appeared to be an unlikely news story has quickly grown into the top international news story in many countries. The author of The God Delusion and several other books has… Read more »

God Not Sure Where To Put Ronnie Biggs

A VATICAN spokesperson stated today that the almighty father of the universe has ‘no idea’ where to put the late Ronnie Biggs, due to the train robbers colourful past. Biggs, who was 84, was being cared for at the Carlton Court Care Home in East Barnet, North London, before croaking it earlier today. His spirit… Read more »

Mandela Deaf Signer Hired As CRC Publicist

Directors of the Central Remedial Clinic (CRC) have acted swiftly in their PR battle against the wave of criticism they have received in relation to ‘top up’ payments made to some of their members. The CRC has been in the headlines ever since news broke of salaries being paid out that were in excess of… Read more »

American Gun Enthusiasts Welcome Amazon Air Drone Targets Containing Free Prize

GUN ENTHUSIASTS have welcomed Amazons latest venture in air-delivery technology today, stating the drones will make great target practice with the bonus addition of a free prize. Thousands of excited Americans are expected to line up outside delivery centres once the drone trials start. “This will be like clay-pigeon shooting,” said one Texan. “Only for… Read more »

Astronomy Ireland: ‘Comet Was Some Heap Of Shite’

ASTRONOMY IRELAND confirmed today that Comet ISON was ‘some heap of shite’ after it burned up today passing through the sun’s atmosphere. The crap piece of rock’s 5.5-million-year journey to the inner solar system ended after it broke up like a ‘soggy digestive in a mug of tea’ , astronomers have said. “It was hyped… Read more »