Category: WORLD NEWS

Americans Already Happy With Depth Of Their Ceilings

A RECENT survey in the US has found that a staggering 98% of Americans are already very happy with their ceiling depth and find no reason to increase it as recently suggested by their president. Barack Obama had warned the country they risked tipping the world back into a recession and throwing “millions more people out… Read more »

Obama Calls For Tougher Kenyan Gun Control Laws

AMERICAN PRESIDENT Barack Obama has called for tougher gun control laws in Kenya this evening after 62 people were killed in a shopping mall in the African country. Mr. Obama condemned the Kenyan government for its lackadaisical approach to automatic weapons, and called on the state to ‘clamp down’ on arms distribution. “It shames me… Read more »

Russia Deny Claims World Championships Look FAB-U-LOUS!

RUSSIAN PREMIER Vladimir Putin has stoutly rejected claims that despite every effort to suppress so-called ‘homosexual propaganda’, the 2014 World Championships have actually turned out to be a flamboyant and excessive display that bares all the hallmarks of being organised by members of the gay community. In an exclusive interview with WWN’s roving reporter and… Read more »

America Vows To Side With Eventual Winner Of Egyptian Conflict

THE LEADER of the Free World’ US President Barack Obama has read words from a carefully drafted statement in response to the reported slaughter of hundreds of Egyptian citizens. Appalled by the images being relayed by international media outlets, President Obama has gone as far as to sit on a meticulously constructed fence which gives… Read more »