Category: WORLD NEWS

Iceland Will Melt If Volcano Erupts, Warn Scientists

THE entire island of Iceland will melt if Bardarbunga volcano erupts, scientists have warned today in a dramatic last attempt to evacuate the region. “You are all going to drown!” informed lead seismologist Dr. Ken Hackman at an emergency televised press conference this morning. “Lava and ice just doesn’t go together. Are you people crazy?… Read more »

34 Dead From Hypothermia Following Ice Bucket Challenge

THE CELEBRITY endorsed ‘ice bucket challenge’ has done much to raise awareness and much needed funds for the fight against motor neurone disease (known more commonly as ASL in America) but in the last 48-hours a number of people have sadly died after attempting the well-meaning challenge. As many as 34 young people in America,… Read more »

Vatican Uncovers Rare, Long Forgotten 11th Commandment

REPORTS from around the world have been suggesting for some weeks now that the Vatican had been withholding information on a newly discovered 11th commandment and now the Vatican have finally confirmed the news. Spokesperson for the Vatican Furio Giunta was sheepish about the exact contents of the 11 commandment but did relay some information… Read more »

Severed Heads Now Top Of Young Boys Christmas List

FOLLOWING a tweeted picture posted by jihadi fighter Khaled Sharrou of his son holding a severed head of a Syrian soldier to camera, thousands of young boys across the world have since put pen to paper in an early xmas list bid to Santa Claus. ‘Dear Santa,’ wrote eight-year-old Charlie McGeever, who’s parents wished to… Read more »

ISIS Suicide Bombers Go On Strike Amid Safety Fears

FOLLOWING a recent incident which saw a suicide bomb instructor blow himself, a growing number of members of the repellent extremist group ISIS have gone on strike. The blowing up of a suicide bomb instructor has raised serious questions about safety among the forces who are attempting to institute a tyrannical caliphate throughout Iraq. “I… Read more »

ISS Astronaut Totally Blanking Ireland For Some Reason

AFTER weeks of assuming that an astronaut currently orbiting Earth on-board the International Space Station was just too busy to tweet pictures of Ireland from space, Irish people are today coming to terms with the fact that he may be intentionally blanking us. Commander Chuck Denver, an American astronaut who joined the ISS crew in… Read more »