Category: LOCAL NEWS

Craic May Rise To 91, Fear Experts

THE hands of the craic doomsday clock have been moved forward by experts for the first time in nearly 20 years, with experts fearing that the sheer ‘gasness’ of being Irish may breach the tolerable ‘craic = 90’ benchmark in the coming weeks. The combination of St. Patrick’s Day, the amount of pent-up craic accumulated… Read more »

Nurses Whinging Again

A SPOKESPERSON for the government and the HSE has expressed their dismay at the fact a social media post from a psychiatric nurse, who has criticised how she and her colleagues are treated in Ireland, has gone viral, with the spokesperson careful to dismiss the post which has over 44,000 likes as just nurses whinging… Read more »

Police Investigate Angel Massacre

A SPECIALLY-formed unit of An Garda Síochana has been drafted in to help solve the mysterious circumstances surrounding the deaths of hundreds of angels across Ireland, with only their telltale outline in the fresh snow brought by Storm Emma for clues. A spokesperson for the Snow Patrol has estimated that as many as 786 angels were… Read more »