Category: LOCAL NEWS

Broken Election Promise Kills One

A BROKEN election promise to secure 24/7 cardiac care in Waterford last year has tragically taken its first life this week after a local man died of cardiac arrest while being transferred to a real hospital in Cork. WWN is sad to confirm the untimely passing of 39-year-old Thomas Power, from Bell Lake near Dunmore East,… Read more »

Local Woman Currently 67% Sweat

LOCAL woman Grainne Kelly has exclusively revealed to WWN that thanks to the horribly stuffy work space she calls an office combining with the unforgiving heat, her body is currently made up of 67%. The Dublin office worker was first subjected to becoming a gloopy assemblage of limbs and liquid upon entering the city centre… Read more »

Met Éireann Staff Given Bonus Following Good Weather

STAFF at Met Éireann have successfully activated a clause in their contracts which will see them net a bumper bonus, thanks in no small part to this week’s heat wave. With temperatures hitting the 20s this past weekend ,staff at the weather procurement agency hit one of their main temperature targets, helping themselves to a… Read more »

Psoriasis Sufferer Has Tried Sunbeds, Cheers

WATERFORD native and long-time psoriasis sufferer Martin Harkett has today put considerable thought into getting a tattoo on his face that tells well-meaning people that yes, he has indeed ‘tried sunbeds’ to alleviate his skin complaint, they weren’t effective in the slightest, but cheers for the advice. Harkett, 37, was first diagnosed with the ‘annoying-as-fuck’… Read more »