Category: LOCAL NEWS

Hilarious Facebook User Quotes Father Ted Again

AFTER FOURTEEN likes from complete strangers, Facebook user Mark Holden patted himself on the back again for writing yet another perfectly timed Father Ted quote on a comments thread. The 28-year-old funny man immediately swooped in to action after a local news page reported of gunshots being fired in the Ukrainian standoff in Crimea. “I… Read more »

36 Feared Dead After Pancake Sale Stampede In Dublin

  EMERGENCY SERVICES say there are still 17 people unaccounted for after a Pancake Tuesday sale went horribly wrong in a Dublin branch of Super Value earlier this morning. At 8am, crowds of bargain hunters swarmed the store to purchase freshly made pancakes from the Bakery department. Witnesses stated after the doors were opened a… Read more »

Gardai Looking To Question Karma Following Gilligan Hit

  DUBLIN DETECTIVES have said they are currently looking to speak to Karma following the shooting of drug trafficker John Gilligan last night at a house in Clondalkin. Gardai announced their ‘only prime suspect’ this morning after questioning numerous residents in the Greenfort Crescent housing estate last night. “One name kept popping up so we… Read more »

Cliffs Of Moher To Be Lowered Due To Safety Fears

THE WILD Atlantic way promises to become one of the most scenic drives the world has ever seen, but with tough new EU safety measures, it could come at a cost. The €10 million initiative, which will see a 2,500km coastal route stretching from Donegal to Cork, will have to adhere to strict guidelines laid out… Read more »