Category: LOCAL NEWS

Larry Murphy Welcomes Gilligan Heat

CONVICTED RAPIST Larry Murphy said he more than welcomes the Garda attention on John Gilligan this week, stating it takes a lot of the heat from him. Mr Murphy, who was found guilty of killing several missing women by TV3 and the Sunday world, told WWN that he may even return home for the Christmas,… Read more »

Irish Media’s Vow Of Silence Surrounding Gemma O’Doherty Rewarded With Pulitzer Prize

An ingenious collaboration between 95% of the Irish media has seen the Pulitzer Prize committee award it with a special achievement award. The Irish media took a well considered ‘vow of silence’ when an award-winning Irish Independent journalist was fired for making inquiries into the apparent quashing of penalty points awarded to Garda Commissioner Martin… Read more »

Study Shows Some Thick Cunts Emigrated Too

THE CENTRAL Statistics Office’s figures reveal over 200,000 people have emigrated since the economic crisis of 2008. Hot on the heels of these figures on emigration comes a study from UCC’s Institute for Social Science which gets to the bottom of the country’s disheartening ‘brain drain’. ‘Brain Drain’ is a technique used by foreign countries… Read more »

‘Stuffed’ Shergar Found In Sitting Room Of McFeely Home

CHAMPIONSHIP RACEHORSE Shergar has been found stuffed in Tom McFeely’s home earlier today. A Garda source confirmed the Criminal Assets Bureau (CAB) ordered a full scale search of the mansion on Ailesbury Road in Ballsbridge, south Dublin, after a plumber discovered €140,000  last Friday. The former IRA hunger striker and and bankrupt developer was later arrested at the scene and brought… Read more »

Students Devastated At Thought Of Teachers Strike

STUDENTS have expressed their utter devastation at the possibility of an upcoming teaching strike. The keen learners ranging in age from 12-18 have made their feelings known in regards to the latest impasse between the coalition Government and the teaching unions. The frosty relationship between the Government and the ASTI remains intact as the teachers’… Read more »

Irish Nurses Hope To Break Guinness World Record For Stomach Pumping This Arthur’s Day

Nurses working in A&E at St Vincent’s hospital in Dublin are excited by the prospect of becoming world record breakers this Arthur’s Day. The long standing day celebrating all things Guinness continues to enrapture vast swathes of the Irish public keen on acquiring debilitating early liver failure. The nurses hope to break the current record… Read more »