Category: LOCAL NEWS

Cork Detain 3 Dublin Migrants Off The Coast Of Youghal

THE People’s Republic Of Cork’s Navy rescued and detained three Dublin migrants off the coast of Youghal earlier this morning. Turlough O’Brien Callaghan, Síofra Callaghan O’Brien and Rudiger O’Brien Callaghan O’Brien were apprehended at 9.20am this morning as they attempted to gain access to Youghal and what Cork officials have called ‘Cork’s superior way of… Read more »

Autopsy On Local Man Finds Yes Campaign Rammed Down His Throat

AN autopsy carried out on local man Gerry Hegarty has found the cause of death to be a large yes campaign lodged down his throat, starving him of oxygen and resulting in his eventual death. Pathologist Eamon Lean, who carried out the post mortem examination, said that Mr Hegarty’s airway’s were completely blocked by the yes campaign and warned that his… Read more »