Category: SPORT

Football Hooligans Thank Liverpool FC For Handy Bigotry Guide

FOOTBALL hooligans from Britain and further a field have thanked Liverpool F.C for providing them with a handy ‘bigotry guide’ of derogatory words and phrases. The literature was circulated within Anfield to make all staff aware of language unsuitable for use but there have been unintentional consequences. Terry Craddock, an ardent fan of yelling obscenities… Read more »


THE NATIONS hurling fans laughed their bollocks off following Kilkenny’s exit from this years championship yesterday afternoon in Semple Stadium, it has been revealed today. Absolutely every other county GAA follower were said to be ‘in stitches’ shortly after their five point defeat against Cork. “Ah man, I think myself and the whole pub laughed… Read more »

Blow To Chewing Gum Manufacturer Following Fergie Exit

CHEWING GUM manufacturer Wrigley’s announced today it will be scaling down production following news of Alex Ferguson’s retirement yesterday afternoon. The 122-year-old company will start laying off an estimated 90% of its world-wide workforce from June, which will see 3,078 full-time workers made redundant. Future lay-offs will coincide with the end of the 2012/13 premier… Read more »

Country Holds It’s Breath As Minister For Finance Puts Entire EU Bailout Fund On 9/4 Favourite ‘Hurricane Fly’ At Cheltenham

THE Republic of Ireland will be holding it’s breath today as the entire European/IMF bailout fund (€80bn) was put on the 9/4 favourite,  Hurricane Fly, in the Champion hurdle at Cheltenham today. It is estimated a ‘staggering’  2.5 million viewers will be glued to their television sets for the race at 3:20 this afternoon. Hurricane Fly’s recent record makes him a… Read more »

‘Irish Quitter Gene’ Behind McIlroy Walk-Off, Claim British Golf Enthusiasts

BRITISH Golf enthusiasts have pinned the blame on Rory McIlroy’s ‘Irish quitter gene’ today, following his dramatic walk-off from the Honda Classic last Friday. The 23-year-old hit the headlines when he quit the tournament after struggling through the first eight holes of his second round in seven-over par, leaving many British fans uncertain about the golf-pros true nationality…. Read more »