Car Passenger Secretly Concentrating On Road

TRYING his best not to look overly frightened or scared, car passenger and human travelling at 110kmh, Dermot Williams, gave one word replies to motorist and friend James Woods as he casually took yet another bend slightly over the dividing white line. “She’s a nippy little yoke,” exclaimed the son-of-two, as his anus unclenched in… Read more »

‘Loser’ Park Bench Not Dedicated To Anyone

A WOODEN bench situated in Waterford’s People’s park has been branded as “a loser” today by locals after the bench was found not dedicated to anyone in particular, raising questions as to why it is even there in the first place. In an emergency meeting organised by the park’s committee, bench 12d on the south east side was the… Read more »

Mechanic Not Promising Anything

“YEAH, leave it with me and I’ll take a look, but I wouldn’t worry about it too much,” said local mechanic Michael Kinglan, before going on to add that contrary to what he had just said to us, it was indeed cause for worry. “The thing with older cars like this is that they’re better… Read more »

Hundreds Of Thousands Camp Out Overnight For WWN Live Show Tickets

HUNDREDS of thousands of news fans braved cold temperatures overnight to secure their tickets for what is expected to be the greatest and most intelligent live stage show of the world has ever seen. Queues spanning up to four kilometers began building outside Ticketmaster outlets across the country from last week, with desperate fans setting up their camping gear… Read more »