Category: HEALTH

GP Prescribing Benzos Like He’s On Commission

“Oh, you’re feeling a little bit down after your gerbil died; here’s a prescription for some benzos that should keep you in a nice, vegetative state for the next few years,” Dr. Kevin Hoggan told his 5th such patient this week as we entered his surgery. Speaking to WWN, the general practitioner admitted to not knowing off hand… Read more »

Here’s What The HSE Is Fucking Up Today

AS HAS become apparent in recent years it is near impossible for the average person to keep abreast of the large volume of fuck ups overseen by senior officials at the HSE and in the Department of Health, which is why WWN has produced this daily guide to keep you informed. Apologies we haven’t done… Read more »

Googling Cancer Now The Number One Cause Of Cancer

A QUICK Google search on the leading causes of cancer has shown that googling the leading causes of cancer may be the leading cause of cancer, WWN can confirm. By simply asking the world-leading search engine for information on your symptoms, the average person is 10 times more likely to receive disheartening news which will… Read more »

Some Crap About Wine Causing Cancer, Just Keep Scrolling

HERE’S some crap research which somehow equates smoking 10 cigarettes to one bottle of wine but just keep on scrolling through your news feed because fuck this shit, wine is lovely so it is, WWN can confirm. UK researchers with obviously nothing else better to do have decided to help media outlets create clickbait style reports… Read more »