Fearful Comedian Carr Seeks Asylum In Syrian Embassy

ENGLISH comedian and humorist Jimmy Carr walked into the Syrian embassy in London this morning seeking political asylum, a lawyer for the man said today. The 39-year-old  arrived with several large vehicles full of cash at 8am on Belgrave Square, and asked for asylum under the United Nations Human Rights Declaration. Earlier Mr Carr announced that he ‘made a terrible error… Read more »

Government: New Water Meters To Include ‘Draw Something’ App For First Million Customers

THE GOVERNMENT announced today that all new water meters will include a ‘draw something’ app for the first one million lucky customers. Taoiseach Enda Kenny unveiled a prototype version of the new water measuring device this afternoon which has a circular 5 inch touch-screen display unit mounted on its head. The free gaming application will work in conjunction with the meters main goal… Read more »

Mourners Post Really Funny Crack ‘Tribute Jokes’ To The Late Great Whitney Houston

THOUSANDS of mourning Irish men and women posted really funny crack ‘tribute jokes’ on Facebook today in an emotional memorial to the late Whitney Houston. The tribute jokes started pouring in seconds after the singers death late last night. The majority of which were sourced from the on-line joke website ‘Sickipedia’. Many mourners opted for… Read more »

Pippa Middleton’s Arse Announces Split With Cheeks

Pippa Middleton’s arse has parted with its cheeks, after an astonishing 28 years together. The buttocks of the younger sister of the Duchess of Cambridge announced on its website,, that the marriage was over after it’s cheeks decided to go its separate ways last week. It wrote: “I am very sad to say that myself and cheeks have parted due to… Read more »

Queen ‘Fucking Stoked’ About Jubilee

THE Queen of England said she was ‘fucking stoked’ about her upcoming diamond jubilee celebrations, which will take place on the week-end of the 2-5 of June this year in London. The 85-year-old monarch told press today of her excitement when she arrived in King’s Lynn as she marks the 60th anniversary of her accession to… Read more »

‘Black Actors Still Being Typecast For Black Roles’, Say Anti-Racism Group

AN anti-racism organisation, Anti-Racist Action (ARA), slammed the film industry today, claiming black actors are still being typecast for black film roles in Hollywood. A survey carried out by the ARA has revealed that black actors still feel that their skin colour does not allow them to play other races like Caucasian or Hispanic in movies. Spokesman for… Read more »