“You Haven’t Heard The Last Of Me” Insists X-Factor Contestant You’ve Heard The Last Of

ONE of the contestants from this year’s X-Factor has stated that they will have an incredible music career, which will last for generations, in direct contradiction to the rapid descent into obscurity that surely awaits them. The contestant, whose name and gender we’ve already forgotten, made the statement following their exit from the decreasing-in-popularity talent… Read more »

Mick Jagger Celebrates Birth Of New Carer

73-YEAR-OLD rockstar and Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger has celebrated a new addition to his team of dedicated carers following the birth of his latest progeny, WWN can confirm. In recent years, many aging rockstars have taken to repopulating the earth in a bid to ensure they have the requisite number of carers required to… Read more »