Category: BUSINESS


Dublin Crime Gangs Announce Job Vacancies

THERE was good news on the jobs front today, as several Dublin crime syndicates announced a number of vacancies, available immediately. Suitable candidates will be well-versed in drug-trafficking, money laundering, racketeering, and menacing the public, with the ability to kill another human being without remorse considered a bonus, but not essential. The hiring spree comes… Read more »

Dyson Introduce Revolutionary €6,500 Window

THE way we experience a breeze blowing through our homes could be about to change forever, after air manipulation experts Dyson announced the revolutionary new “Vindow”, expected to hit the market at a cool (and cooling) €6,500. Having done wonders in the field of moving air from A to B with their vacuum cleaners, fans… Read more »

Food Safety Authority Shuts Down Nando’s For Failing To Adhere To New Cheeky Guidelines

THE country’s Nando’s restaurants have all been ordered to close their doors by the Food Safety Authority (FSA) after failing a routine cheeky check up. “We’d warned them countless times, chicken shouldn’t be that cheeky. Yet our social media monitoring team was inundated with a barrage of people reporting that they were going for a… Read more »

World’s First ‘Men Only’ Car Insurer Burned To The Ground By Feminists

EMERGENCY services in south county Dublin today have contained a substantial blaze in the Sandyford area after the offices for Ireland’s first ‘men’s only’ insurance providers were burnt to the ground by a group of angry feminists. Gardai at the scene believe that over twenty women armed with several canisters of petroleum invaded the offices of 4MenOnly.ie in a… Read more »