Category: BREAKING NEWS


Incredibly Boring Person Insists On Telling A Story

A group of friends gathered for dinner in the house of Daniel Fitzgerald yesterday evening in the hope of enjoying some good company and even better food. However, the night was to take a coma-inducing turn when Andrew ‘Andy’ Mongey decided to share with his friends a long and terribly uninteresting story. Bouyed by the… Read more »

33rd County Discovered By Family Out For A Stroll

Ireland is in shock today as news broke of the discovery of a 33rd county. Newsrooms up and down the country, including our own, are working flat out to obtain more details about what could be the biggest development in Irish history since the foundation of the State. The Moore family from Strandhill in Sligo… Read more »

Ireland To Return To The Bond Markets, Whatever They Are

WWN understands many Irish people are reacting positively to the news that Ireland is to return to the bond markets imminently, whatever they are. The National Treasury Management Agency (NTMA) is to issue a 10-year government bond which bodes well for the overall health and future of the Irish economy, we think. WWN’s resident financial… Read more »

Something, Something Weather

Everybody is talking about it. No sense in missing out. ‘Tis fierce windy’ will probably do it. Waves. Did you see that one picture and your man, bold as brass he was, with the phone out and him right beside the coastal wall. Ah, you know yourself though, some people just have a death wish…. Read more »

Pylon Attacks Seven Year Old Boy In Dublin

A DUBLIN boy was attacked by a 50 metre pylon today while innocently walking on his way to school. Derek O’Brien left his home at 8.45am this morning, with his older sister Theresa, to attend their local primary school in a bid to educate themselves and emigrate post leaving cert. Whilst taking a shortcut through… Read more »

Man With Official Looking Badge Convinced He Is Important

Wicklow Man Ross Filan took to the streets of Arklow today to inform people of his inherent importance. Mr. Filan, a 31-year-old health and safety officer, began restricting people’s access to Wong’s takeaway on Arklow main street by producing a shiny badge. Mr. Filan freely brandished his impressive state accredited health and safety ID to… Read more »

Waterford Man Finds Elusive HTTP 404 Hiding In Attic

A COUNTY Waterford Man discovered the elusive HTTP 404 hiding in his attic after he began putting away his Christmas decorations late yesterday evening. Michael Price contacted local Gardai after uncovering the standard response code at 8pm. The father-of-four said he was absolutely shocked to discover it had been living in his attic for over… Read more »

Meek To Sue Jesus Over Earth Inheritance Claim

THE MEEK have announced they are suing Jesus Christ of Nazareth over an Earth inheritance claim which was promised to them nearly 2000 years ago. The group have said they are ‘sick and tired’ of waiting around for the inheritance to be signed over to them, and have hired a team of lawyers to help… Read more »