Bouncy Castles To Be Renamed ‘Standstill Castles’ Over Insurance Fears

CONCERNS surrounding soaring insurance costs have driven bouncy castle hire companies to implement new rules that forbid bouncing on castles, WWN can confirm.

With more and more play area and adventure centres at risk of closing their doors due to spiking premiums, the new laws will ensure that kids still get to play on inflatable palaces, but only if they stand stock still without any sort of jumping, bouncing, hopping, leaping, or fun.

Should everyone abide by the restrictions of these new ‘standstill castles’, hire companies will be able to stay in business until at least the next round of insurance hikes.

“Our kid wanted a bouncing castle for his birthday, but we weren’t able to afford it due to the rise in hire costs, as well as our own fears about what happens if one of his mates spilled out of it in outlets back garden” said one Waterford family we spoke to.

“But now thanks to these new Standstill rules, the kids get an inflatable castle and we don’t have to sell our house if some kid snaps his collarbone. Granted, it’s not any fun for them, but who can afford fun any more?”

Meanwhile, insurance companies have suggested that parents should allow their kids to get as fat and sedentary as possible, with the promise of a 4 euro discount per kg, per child.