FAI Issue Carefully Worded One Finger Statement To Irish Public

IN A BID to bring much needed clarity to the evidence given by their organisation to the Oireachtas Sports Committee yesterday, the FAI has released a carefully worded one finger statement directly to the Irish public.

Seeking to offer a more considered testimony that gives a better account of themselves, the FAI released a hand drawn picture of a hand flipping the middle finger, which is commonly used to denote the phrase ‘fuck you’.

Many members of the public were angered by the evasive and purposefully meandering answers given by FAI representatives who rarely addressed questions posed by the few TDs and Senators that weren’t shamefully attempting to glue their tongues to the hole of John Delaney.

Asked why his colleagues persisted with a tactic of obfuscation when asked perfectly reasonable questions which the Irish public and football supporters were entitled to answers on, and indeed why he himself refused to answer questions, Delaney was candid.

“On legal advice I refer you to the one finger FAI statement made earlier,” confirmed Delaney.

Asked once more by the Irish public on the issue of the €100,000 bridging loan, and why board members and the honorary treasurer were not informed, John Delaney and the FAI were uncharacteristically open, honest and forthright: “Yiz can fucking read can’t ya? We refer you back to our original statement”.