AN OLD and dilapidated Dublin apartment block has been brought down in no time after a demolition team used a revolutionary method which is set to take the demolition industry by storm.
Instead of a wrecking ball, Duffy & Sons Demolition hung a ready-to-eat avocado from a local supermarket to the cables of their crane, leveling everything in their path as a result.
“We’ve searched for what feels like forever the perfect solution. Our old wrecking balls rusted too quickly and it was a ball-ache trying to attach it every morning. We tried it for a while with a bowling ball, but there was not enough power behind it,” explained contractor David Duffy.
“The avocado was actually a fluke. Piotr, our crane operator, had bought two ready-to-eat avocados in Lidl for lunch. Timing is everything though, one minute a rock hard avocado can bust through a building, the next it turns to a gone off mush.”
Duffy was happy to show what kind of damage you can do with a ready-to-eat avocado from your local shop: with one sweep, he takes down the outside wall of the flat. The rest of the building quickly descends under loud glass shattering and being compressed into oblivion.
“Now we are looking for another destination for that other avocado. Maybe it can be used in a game of Hurling if they lose a sliotar, or throw it into the cement mill as a grinding stone. Or wait until 2040 when it’s suddenly perfect for eating.”