Alan Keys Sues Ikea

WATERFORD man Alan Keys is confident of a massive payout from Swedish furniture giants Ikea, after launching a copyright infringement against them relating to their use of a tool which he claims was named after him.

Keys, 35, is seeking a €4bn settlement from Ikea, which he states is back-pay for their use of ‘Allen key’ tools in their flat-pack furniture kits dating back to the store’s inception in 1943.

Although Keys has googled the origin of the Allen Key and learned that the hexagonal-headed tool dates back to 1910 when it was first designed by the Allen company in Connecticut, he still thinks that Ireland’s lax laws when it comes to frivolous claims should be enough to get him a few quid at least.

“Ikea could have used any system of fixing they liked; nails, screws… nails… anything. But they chose one that shares my name,” said Keys, whose Dad called him Alan because he thought it was funny.

“Since Ikea arrived in Dublin, I’ve been the butt of countless jokes with the lads. They all think it’s hilarious. ‘Hey Alan, I bought a wardrobe, can you help me put it together?’… yeah, it’s funny the first time, but you get seriously sick of it. So the ball is in Ikea’s court. I can take them to court and they risk billions, or they can settle with me right now for €500. I will accept in-store vouchers”.

Ikea have yet to respond as they are already locked in a similar lawsuit with a Canadian man called Billy Bookcase.