Let the Casement see the basement!
Wildly popular dating TV show Take Me Out continues garnering new fans who love the idea of one man being put in front 30 eligible ladies to fight over.
But the question, which has been on everybody’s lips, remains – how would our beloved 1916 leaders fair on the ITV show fronted by Paddy McGuinness.
1) Padraig Pearse
The contestants would initially butcher the pronunciation of his name but would warm to a man who is obviously very passionate with Paddy insisting on calling him Pad Rag.
Our experts conservatively estimate he would still have 20 out of 30 lights after the first round. Not many people are aware but Padraig had a very noticeable squint which the Take Me Out women would pretend not to silently judge him about.
Padraig, off to a good start, would dramatically lose a further 19 lights after the ladies learned how important his Catholic faith was to him in the second round which heard from interviews with those closest to him.
Round three – the talent round would see Padraig dressed in full military regalia quoting from the Proclamation. Full lights out from there sadly.
2) Roger Casement
Roger would benefit from the fact he looks like the result of scientific experimentation which sought to create the perfect hipster.
With that stand out facial hair he would remain 30 for 30 in the first round with no lady turning off their light.
News of the fact he was widely traveled with time spent in the Congo and Brazil would put plenty of women off who didn’t like the idea of partner who would be away for long periods of time cataloging the crimes of King Leopold of Belgium, thus reducing his options to 12.
However, after then learning of his gunning past many women would regret turning their lights off. Roger would likely be matched with Tegan, an Instagram influencer from Bradford.
3) James Connolly
Initially James would be a big hit with the ladies due to his Scottish brogue but once there was mention of him having kids and the belief that wealthy people should be heavily taxed the 30 women couldn’t hit their lights fast enough.
4) Thomas Clarke
A silver fox, Tom would intrigue the ladies at first with his gentrified and mannerly ways, with his Tyrone accent winning plenty of them over.
However, being a member of the Irish Republican Brotherhood, an organisation banned by the English government wouldn’t sit well with the ladies on Take Me Out and poor Tom would head home without securing a trip to Fernandos.
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