Man Leaving CBD Oil Store Like He’s Under Garda Surveillance

UNSURE about the legal implications of his latest purchase from his local CBD store, Waterford man Daniel Power checked to see if the coast was clear before attempting to leave the shop.

Clutching several CBD products in his hand, the son of two contemplated shoving them down his jocks just to be safe before remembering his forgot to put them on this morning and had been freeballing all day.

“Hopefully they’ll fit in my socks,” the 34-year-old told himself, now scoping the street outside, “the cop shop is only up the road and they’re always passing, the cunts, maybe there’s a back way out of here”.

Unaware he wasn’t breaking any law, Power turned on his heels as a D registration plate Ford Mondeo passed.

“No hubcaps, aerials, that’s definitely the DS,” Power convinced himself, now preparing to neck the evidence if it came down to a stop and search, “maybe I’ll call in a bomb scare down the town and distract the pigs”.

“They probably have this place under surveillance, shit, why didn’t I think of that?… fuck, fuck, fuck,” he now shouted aloud, freaking out the stores sales assistant before legging it out the door.