THE AA responded to their now almost weekly call out to Old Trafford after onlookers confirmed the presence of a broken down bus, which was wedged in front of the goal defended by the Manchester United team managed by Jose Mourinho.
A lack of tyre marks on the pitch suggested the bus had not moved from its spot once it was driven there by its owner, Jose Mourinho, who has since denied all knowledge of the bus.
“I know nothing of this bus. I drive a Ferrari and only travel at exciting speeds, for exciting moments,” Mourinho explained when an AA employee asked for his policy number with the insurance company. The AA worker was quick to point out the terrible parking job which didn’t even cover the entirety of the goal.
The previous night, the Old Trafford pitch had been witness to a performance some, if not all, United fans have described using only a dizzying array of swear words. The majority of fans had turned up to watch a game of football, but were annoyed to discover the presence of a bus on the goal line.
“If the owner says it isn’t even his bus, and he says it definitely wasn’t there last night, it’s a hard one to get to the bottom of,” AA worker Greg Yardley explained to WWN, “but just looking at the bus, it’s in a right state. There’s holes in it, the sort of size that you could easily fit a football through”.
Elsewhere, Mourinho defended his side’s pathetic exit from the Champion’s League at the hands of Sevilla by confirming “Manchester is a piece of shit club that only know failure, and they are lucky I even turn up to park a very exciting and fast car here every day, that is definitely not a bus,” Mourinho said in comments which have further endeared him to the club’s fan base.