Sexton’s Drop Goal Uploaded To Pornhub

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DUE to the fact its erotic content has a 100% success rate in inducing disturbing groans of pleasure, Jonathan Sexton’s last gasp drop goal against France has been uploaded successfully to online pornography site, Pornhub.

While experts had previously believed it was impossible to be sexually attracted to and aroused by a piece of rugby, Irish users have proven such assumptions to be incorrect as a video of the drop kick has been viewed 62 million times already with multiple uploads of the video accounting for .00000096% of Pornhub’s entire traffic yesterday.

“It’s right up there with ‘Backdoor Milf Action 5’ and the Father Ted parody porn stuff as Ireland’s most beloved over 18s, sexually explicit viewing material,” one Pornhub spokesperson shared with WWN.

There have been reports that many men find themselves breathing heavily and becoming increasingly excited while watching the video, before retiring into a lengthy refractory period, exhausted.

“Obviously they have trouble lasting the 41 phases, but the final 5 or 6 seconds leading up to the drop goal seems the ideal length of time for most to get their own ‘kicks’,” added the Pornhub spokesperson, who crunched the numbers and hard data.

“The majority of women, however, enjoy the entire 41 phases before collapsing in a satisfied heap”. Despite claims to the contrary, the average man only lasts up to 4 phases.

Historically, crime levels are often seen decreasing during sporting events such as soccer matches, however, analysts saw a different trend during Ireland’s first match of the 6 Nations tournament.

“There was a dramatic decrease in the number of people ordering soy lattes in Starbucks and asking to speak to the manager. There were zero instances of Audis and BMWs being parked on double yellow lines and most intriguingly, disabled car parking spaces outside yacht clubs were empty and available for use by disabled people,” one analyst explained.

The NSFW clip is best viewed in a quiet room by yourself, which allows you all the alone time you need.

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Posted by Waterford Whispers News on Wednesday, 17 October 2018
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