AN at present ‘adorable child’ will cross over into the realm of ‘insufferable little bollocks who won’t shut up’ within minutes if her new found party trick of whistling isn’t put to rest, WWN can report.
Ella Lally (4), discovered how to whistle not minutes ago while attending her older cousin Ciaran’s 9th birthday party, and has been delighting in being able to show off her new talent.
“Mam, Mam, Mam, Mam,” Ella said while pulling on the trouser leg of her mother’s jeans, as she was in the middle of getting a second’s rest, “look what I can do now,” added the child before launching into two minutes of sustained whistling which ran the very real risk of pissing off absolutely every adult within a two-mile radius.
Despite a number of adults in the immediate vicinity remarking that Ella was ‘cute’ or ‘gas’, the 4-year-old amateur whistler’s insistence at continuing to whistle put him at risk of becoming unbearable within seconds, cute and all as she is.
“Grandad, Grandad, look, look, look,” Ella added while shouting at her grandfather moments before giving a rendition of only piercing note she knows how to whistle at this moment in time.
“Which one of my kid’s owns this prick? And can they shut her up,” shared Ella’s grandfather, Richard, who didn’t retire last year to be stuck listening to ‘torturous shit like this’.
Ella’s mouth is expected to be taped shut within the hour if she doesn’t stop running around the house in circles while whistling a tune described as leading sound experts as ‘like a cat scratching a blackboard while being punched played through a broken megaphone’.