WWN Horoscopes

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aries

21 March – 20 April

You cancel your plans to visit America for the foreseeable future, ever.

taurus

21 April – 21 May

They said you’d never amount to anything, and boy how right they were.

gemini

May 21 – June 20

You eat 25 portions of fruit in a single day, freeing you up to eat nothing but crap for the rest of the week.  

cancer

June 21 – July 22

You impose sanctions on North Korea.  

leo

July 23 – August 22

This week you start to binge watch Coronation Street right from the start.  

virgo

August 23 – September 22

You finally bring a load of overdue tapes back at Xtra-Vision.

libra

September 23 – October 22

You’re suddenly a fan of Waterford hurling. You love them. Always have, always will.  

scorpio

October 23 – November 21

The appearance of a Terminator on Game Of Thrones come as quite a surprise to you.  

sagittarius

November 22 – December 21

You give this ‘put your trousers on, one leg at a time’ thing a go, and you have to admit that it’s not without it’s merits.  

capricorn

December 22 – January 19

You finally pull your penis clean off. You were warned! You didn’t listen!  

aquarius

January 20 – February 18

You put out a plate of Ferrero Rocher for your guests and not one of them thanks you, the spoiled bastards.  

pisces

February 19 – March 20

You decide to quit drinking, but will wait until the new year as there’s no point now with Halloween and Christmas coming up 

Local Student Will Not Purchase Anything Without A Student Discount

Local Student Will Not Purchase Anything Without A Student Discount

Posted by Waterford Whispers News on Thursday, 14 February 2019
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