AN EXHAUSTIVE year long series of experiments on the hips of popular Colombian singer, Shakira’s, have resulted in the first concrete proof that they are incapable of lying, scientists from America’s MIT have confirmed.
It has been long claimed by Shakira that her hips were in no way deceitful, which many members of the public took at face value. However, there had been growing calls for someone to investigate such statements.
Put through rigorous lie detector test after lie detector test, Shakira’s hips remained truthful throughout, prompting scientists at MIT to concede early on that they were incapable of lying.
“We had to be sure. We couldn’t leave anything to chance. We’re scientists God damn it. But yeah, they’re just hips, of course they can’t lie. They can wiggle though, boy can they wiggle,” explained lead scientist of the study into Shakira’s hips, Dr. Shelly Kincannon.
Scientists also confirmed that not only did Shakira’s hips not lie, they also sashayed rhythmically from left to right and back again in a gloriously erotic fashion.
Other claims contained in the popular music hit were, however, disproved entirely.
“We surveyed a number of men who felt Shakira didn’t make them want to learn Spanish at all, which raises questions about whether claims made in the songs lyrics are to be trusted at all,” added Dr. Kincannon.