Vincent Browne Confirms Retirement From Making Politicians Shit Themselves

VETERAN broadcaster has delighted the politicians of Ireland with the news that he is to retire, leaving his popular TV3 current affairs programme without its caustic and take-no-nonsense host.

Browne had spent years as a journalist, broadcaster and editor before turning his attention full time to making politicians completely shit themselves under a barrage of questions with the launch of the Tonight with Vincent Browne Show in 2007.

“It’s a tasking job that would leave anyone exhausted, and we’re delighted Vincent has a chance to enjoy some time on the beach,” shared one spokesperson for TV3 earlier today.

Elsewhere, Irish politicians have already begun a 7-day bender which will see them celebrate the loss of a broadcaster who refused to accept a meandering answer to an entirely different question he definitely didn’t ask.

“Oh, I don’t believe in God, but after hearing this news… we’re back on easy street baby! I don’t have to answer a question properly for the rest of my political career,” confirmed one delighted Dáil TD in between downing shots of tequila.

Browne’s knack for doggedly pursuing politicians on the things they have said and done marked him out as a disgrace to the political broadcasting profession, but forcing politicians into revealing how incompetent they are on live TV will now be a thing of the past when Browne retires at the end of this month.

Speaking to WWN, both Taoiseach Leo Varadkar and Fianna Fáil leader Micheál Martin have expressed their deep regret as they’re schedules would have been ‘wide open’ for interviews they definitely hadn’t been avoiding for years on the first of August, the day after Browne is set to retire.

Currently, a bag of fire-breathing snakes is favourite to take over the current affairs show after Browne steps down.