Local Couple Spend Most Of Their Time Bitching About Other Couples

A LOCAL WATERFORD couple spends the vast majority of time together devoting words, sentences and conversations to ridiculing other couples they are friends with or vaguely know, WWN can exclusively reveal.

Aoife Beglin and Sean Shanahan, with an address in the Waterford area of Ireland, forgo many of the habits and hobbies of other couples such as doing things together and enjoying life, preferring instead to bitch endlessly about other couples, presumably in an effort to feel better about themselves.

“Tom’s put on a bit of weight, I’d say half a stone?” ventured Sean, discussing a couple the 31-year-olds have known for years.

“Ha and the rest, I don’t know how Clare puts up with him, he’s a slob. Honestly, you’d wonder about her like, why she’s still with him, ya know,” queried Aoife, as the pair looked through Facebook photos of their friends smiling while on a hill walk at the weekend.

“A hill walk, Clare hates that stuff. That’s him forcing her like. Remember that time he raised his voice at her, I’d never let you away with that,” Aoife confirmed, discounting the 9 stand up rows she has had with Sean this week alone.

Reclining on their couch together, the pair wondered what secret horrors and unhappiness lay behind the photos of fellow couples they know which show them out enjoying life while on holidays or out socialising.

“Yeah alright, we get it, you’re out at a restaurant. We don’t upload photos on Instagram to prove we’re happy. You know John was riding his secretary, well, you’d presume he is, he just gives off that vibe. A bastard like,” shared Sean, whose baseless accusations were backed up by more speculation from his partner of 4 years.

“Well, who could blame him have you seen the state of Elaine in that picture of them at the gym together. The absolute state,” confirmed Aoife, scanning through photos some 4 hours after the couple initially sat down to pick out something to watch on Netflix.