Lovin’ Waterford: We Get Hammered On Those Wee Bottles Of Beer From Lidl

WITH more and more craft beer hitting the shelves every week, it’s harder than ever to be a beer snob who drinks something that nobody else does. In times like these, it can be worthwhile to dive backwards through the catalogue of ales and lagers to find something that has existed for a long time, rather than something new.

If everyone is drinking the latest hoppy-zesty-oaky pale ale that just hit the market, set yourself aside from the crowd by drinking something that nobody has thought of yet; in this instance, those wee bottles of God knows what that you get in Lidl or Aldi for like 30c apiece.

The first party we went to where we were hitting the wee bottles, we made an instant splash. Nobody gave a fuck about the lad drinking the IPA, nobody cared about the girl on the chocolate stout. All that people talked about were the Lovin’ Waterford crowd, getting hammered on 7 euro worth of stubby bottles. RESULT.

Taste wise? Who cares? You’re getting the double-A experience from these things; alcohol and attention, and that’s all that matters.

Thing with the wee bottles is that they’re gone in two gulps. So you have to constantly keep re-upping your bottle, meaning constant trips to your bag of bottles under the kitchen table. Which is cool. That’s this cool thing that we do. Get with it.

Also nobody knows when you say bottles, you mean little ones. So you can tell people you drank forty bottles and they’ll just think you’ve got this superhuman capacity for drink. Which is cool.

Little bottles makes hands look like I’m a giant.

I don’t need a taxi get fucking away from me.