Local Man To Wear The Bollocks Out Of New Hoodie

A COUNTY Waterford man is expected to wear the absolute bollocks out of a new hoodie he bought, due to its snug fit and crisp sheen.

Thomas Holden, from Johns Park, purchased the Nike garment for €69:99 in a local sports shop, immediately ignoring previous hoodies in his press.

“I’d say it’ll be another few weeks before it goes to the wash,” the 24-year-old explains, “problem with hoodies is they get all stretched and out of shape and are useless after the first couple of washes. Hopefully I’ll get two or three cycles out of it before it’s fucked and unwearable”.

Bought in the January sales after receiving a voucher from his auntie Kate, Holden recalls the moment he wore his new clothes around the town.

“Waterford is like a sports clothes fashion show after Christmas,” added the job seeker,” every young fella in the town does be walking around flashing their trainers and new tracksuits, so picking the right top is essential, and wearing the bollocks out of it is all part of the show”.

So far Holden’s hoodie has only received two nodge burns and a small spec of curry sauce from a curry chip he ate on Saturday.

“If I keep this run of good luck up, it might see Paddies day” he concluded.