Irish Rugby Fan Comes Out As Gay For CJ Stander

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A HETEROSEXUAL Irish rugby fan has defied all commonly held understanding of sexuality and sexual orientation after coming out as gay for CJ Stander and only CJ Stander.

Carlow man Ciaran Gibbons’s appreciation of CJ Stander took on a more erotic tone after the Munster player picked up the man of the match award against Wales while also singing the words to the national anthem, a truly astonishing feat for a man originally from South Africa.

“It’s incorrect to say I would go gay for CJ, as I already have,” confirmed Ciaran Gibbons, who knew his loose approach to defining his sexuality would anger and insult many, “I can’t define what love is, don’t judge me, this lad is South African, but he sang the national anthem… lads, he sang the Irish national anthem”.

Gibbons has also been accused of being an ‘easily turned gay’ after setting his threshold for the deviation from his sexual orientation quite low.

“Jesus, all it takes is a half decent performance and learning some words to a song about some soldiers larking about? I find this a bit offensive as a gay man myself,” confirmed friend of Gibbons’s Matthew Hannon.

Gibbons warned that he couldn’t be held responsible for how his feelings would manifest themselves in the future if he was to learn Stander had watched The Snapper, enjoys the odd Guinness and has attended a ceile.

“I’d be up for anything at that point,” conceded Gibbons, as a disturbing look took over his face.

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