Newly Single Woman Surrounded By Supportive Male Friends Who Want To Sleep With Her

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THE male part of a close knit Waterford community has come out in force to show their support for newly single woman Vicky Morrissey, following her break up with now ex-boyfriend Dermot Lyons.

Vicky, saddened by the ending of a 4-year relationship, has expressed her gratitude to over 20 male friends who came out of the woodwork upon her becoming single some 15 hours ago.

“Just heard the news, awful, I know how hard it can be, will be over in 5 minutes,” Dermot’s former best friend Richie Foley said in a touching posting on Facebook this morning.

Flooded with messages of support and offers to ‘just hang out’ with a bottle of wine, some vodka, a romantic movie maybe and some shots, Vicky also expressed surprise at the sheer number of male friends she forgot she had.

“It’s great to know that at an emotionally fragile time such as this, there’s a queue of men looking to give me a shoulder to lean on,” Vicky explained to WWN.

“Like, have a look at this one, ‘thinking of you babe, love Marc’. I feel bad because I don’t think I know a Marc, unless it’s Teresa from work’s friend Marc who I met once in 2009, but I doubt it. Probably had the wrong number because he sent a dick pic an hour later,” the 26-year-old added.

While the men’s motives are entirely dishonourable, it is thought they will persist for a number of months until Vicky finally declares herself celibate for life.

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